Old notices can be read here
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Messages sent in November 2009 |
I been reading about people with
flashbacks. They happen to me and are horrible. It is difficult
when I wake in the night and think I am back 'there'. It takes
me awhile to get myself back into reality. Nov 9th 2009 |
So sorry to hear about the bullying that has been going on for you. It must have felt awful. What a triggering experience. |
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Messages sent in October 2009 |
Hi
I have read your notice about flashbacks. They sound very
disturbing. I have flashbacks often too and get to feel very
disorientated afterwards. Do your flashbacks happen at the
same time every day? I think that bodily ones are
particularly horrible and yes tiring. I hope that things
ease for you soon,
Amanda
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I was abused when I was a baby up until about 4 years old extensively. I am now 44 and have had daily flashbacks since May. They are quite disabling as I get very tired before bad flashbacks, and if I have had a busy day I am unable to function the next day until the flashback occurs, then I feel better. I cannot enjoy the hobbies I used to enjoy and as the mild flashbacks are constant I always feel worn out. I cannot even concentrate to read, all I do is watch television and my part-time job. The flash backs are bodily feelings and not really unpleasant, it is the tiredness I can not cope with. |
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Messages sent in October 2009 |
"I just wanted to say thanks to the group for having the SAS open day at Islesburgh this week. I've only just started to address and accept things that happened in my past and having the opportunity to make contact with SAS in such an informal way was a real benefit to me. Some of the literature available was also of help to me as reading through what other folk in a similar situations are feeling helps me to feel less alone. " | To read about
the Open and Networking Day their is an excellent article in
Shetland News online
If you look after today it will be accessible in their archives.
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Messages sent in October 2009 |
Hi Is it to late to put a note on board, to reply to a survivor whom wrote a note dated April 2009, asking if there is anyone going through the painful ordeal of giving evidence to police ? You are not alone, if I knew then what I know now I would not hold back. As many tears fell from my eye's as I relived some of the events that tuck place through the years of abuse, very personal events and well kept secrets between me and my thought to be best friend, as I gave evidence to plane clothed police officers, well trained police officers, I couldn't help feeling so very alone sat in a chair holding back tears very frightened of how much trouble I might be causing after I was told for so long how special I was to the abuser, how good I was made to feel at a young age by the abusers misleading antics, I felt very responsible, an adult maybe, to able to play adult games, shown adult magazines, how I was told that it was our best kept secret and no one must every find out, if anyone every found out there would be lots of trouble,it would be my fault.
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Hello I am the survivor who wrote
in Apriul about the police report. I am sad that you had the experience you did and understand something about the feling you might have had. I still have police investigation going on, it is taking a very long time.
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The open day was informative and I was surprised to find how many other people there are in Shetland who offer help for many of the problems that survivors have. I have got some of the leaflets. Thank you. |
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Messages sent in September 2009 |
Hello I wanted to say how good the meeting we had with Siobhan was on Saturday. It was good because she fitted in so well with us all and had alot to offer. Thank you SAS for organising it for us. Anon
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Hi
After aimlessly wondering the Internet not sure what I'm Looking for, Have stumbled across this site. I found it very easy to look through without feeling guilty or ashamed but sometimes angry that I was not there to help some survivors take there pain away, I found myself reading through some poems and felt not alone in the world . I would like to share some of my Journey. John |
In response to the
previous message I would like to say that I have also found the
site helpful and always feel less alone when I read about other
survivors. It is a brave thing to post a story on the site and one day maybe I will be brave enough to do this too. T 29.9.09 |
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Loneliness is one of the things that I often
feel. Sometimes I am in a place where there are lots of people
and I can feel even lonelier then, I think it is because I always feel 'different' because of what happened to me when i was young. I can see other people and think that they have no idea of what it is like to live with the things that I have forever in my head. The memories and the feelings etc. |
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Messages sent in June 2009 |
A letter to the paper I write both as a survivor of abuse and the parent of an abused teenager. Having read the readers views last week, I was appalled by the letter “Avoid snap judgements” but was reassuringly heartened by the letters “Lifetime scarring” and “Think about the abused”. These two letters show both concern and respect for victims, something which, through personal experience, is still very sadly lacking in everyday life. Many sexual predators use their families as a form of emotional blackmail whilst carrying out their disgusting actions, thus putting even more pressure on their victims to keep quiet. If the abusers had any thought or respect for their families they wouldn’t abuse, consequently leaving our families, and their own, to live our lives without the horrendous legacies of their actions Anon |
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Messages sent in April 2009 |
I was speaking with some people the other day, or rather I was listening to some other people speaking, and one of them kept commenting about how I don't say very much. It has never bothered me but I can see that it does bother others, I don't know why though, usually people complain if others talk too much. Anyway, it's been on my mind and I've been wondering why I'm like this, is it because I have an empty head so have nothing to say? It's not because I'm scared to speak, I'm not, which is obvious if someone starts me off on a subject I care about. Then again is it that I don't care about many things? I don't really know, but one thing I do know is that I learned to be quiet so long ago that I don't actually remember learning it. I do remember hiding under beds with my little brother so we could whisper to each other and not been seen or heard by our mother and I remember hiding in the wardrobe with my little sister for the same reason. Communicating with each other was punishable, we always knew that so I suppose it's not really surprising that I'm quite quiet. As I'm writing this I'm appreciating that I do speak out about things I care about, despite my mother. sue 9/4/09 |
Several of my selves
recently had an experience of ‘explosive anger’. Normally we turn
anger inwards either onto the body or internal conflict between
selves which are both destructive. DID Survivor 10.4.09 |
I am a survivor of childhood sexual
abuse and am going through an experience of having reported to the
police and hearing things back about the case. It is very hard and
sometimes lonely and scarey. Telling 'official' people about the
things we were told never to talk about.
I would like to know if there is anyone else going through this experience? |
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Messages sent in March 2009 |
So far this year has been horrible with all different memories and stuff
going on. I hope it gets better because I am tired of it all. 31/3/09 |
Sometimes the difficult times come in
patches. There is always some hope that as time goes by the
difficult feelings will pass. 31.3.09 |
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Messages sent in February 2009 |
February is a strange month. I get the
feelings of spring coming but winter is still here even though the light
is getting more and brighter. It seems to affect me and all the memory
and flashback stuff even though I don't want it to. 19/02/09 |
I finally have given in to my body and been to see a gynaecologist
something that I've known I have needed to do for a long time, (12
years), and I have had to be brave and go. The doctor was really
lovely and understanding and has offered to do all the needed
examinations and tests under general anaesthetic. I'm very relieved
that I'll be asleep when she does these things but I still feel
extremely vulnerable. Do you think alot of survivors fel like this? 19.02.09 |
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Messages sent in January 2009 |
A survivors version of 'Little Miss Muffett'
Poor mr perv,
Stood in the bar
waiting for a drink or two.
Along came a survivor,
stood alongside him,
and frightened
poor pervy away.
28/1/09 |
I found Christmas hard too flashbacks....just the whole family thing really. Sooo glad it is over and done with for another year. |
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Messages sent in January 2009 |
Another year has arrived. Welcome to any new site users and may we all experience some positive healing as we start the journey through 2009. |
I am new to the site and thank you all for
having it online.
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I have read about flashbacks on the
site and in a couple of books. Christmas seems to have brought more
coming to me. Is it like that for anyone else? 19/1/09 |
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Messages sent in December 2008 |
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Messages sent in December 2008 |
Its that time of year coming again. I know christmas is a good time for
alot of people but for me it is a really difficult and triggering time. 8.12.08 |
This time of year is hard for me too, I am
thinking of anyone else out there who is struggling 10.12.08 |
Thoughts of hope for all of us survivors
at this time of year, Site Moderator |
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Messages sent in October 2008 |
I have bought star lights with different colours to
brighten up the rooms. It helps a bit. I hate this time of year but try
and remember spring will come again. 2/11/08 |
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Messages sent in October 2008 |
This time of year when the light is so grey is
horrible I hate it and feel so dreadful inside.
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Someone has put a poem about their
feelings of 'grey' don't know if it may help you feel less isolated. It is in the poems page for during times of struggle. click to go to poems page 13/10.08 |
The greyness and lack of light in Shetland does
really drag me down. I go around putting lights on to try and help.
18.10.08 |
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Messages sent in October 2008 |
I put lights on too and have got
some coloured fairy lights and some sheep lights which help cheer me up. 19.10.08 |
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Messages sent in September 2008 |
A general notice to tell everyone that there are positive things
happening since the DID training when First Person Plural came to
Shetland. We will be putting information on the site over the coming
months. 30.9.08 |
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Messages sent in June 2008 |
A survivor emailed her comments on the Saturday meeting with First
Person Plural about Dissociative Identity Disorder:
Hi there |
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Messages sent in May 2008 |
Even when I'm sad I feel connected and that for me is happiness. |
A survivor has shared her thoughts about recent dental treatment.
28/05.08 |
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Messages sent in April 2008 |
When you fly above what you don't want to be a part
of, you often fly alone. (affirmation: I learn to walk alone and hold the precious silence) Bethyn April 2008 |
Sometimes the healing journey from
abuse feels so lonely maybe its because i dont want to be a part of
the abuse and what all other people think Anon 30/04/08 |
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Messages sent in March 2008 |
I have been reading about DID on this site can anyone recommend any more
helpful books on the subject? 31/03/08 |
Hi, there are three books mentioned in
the book reviews. Go to site content page from Home page to access
these. Anyone with further information about books please email to
let us know, thanks 31/03/08 |
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Messages sent in March 2008 |
Hello I have been very anxious about the recent news
coverage of what went on in Jersey and all the abuse. I was abused
in undergreound rooms and reported it to the police but there hasnt been
enough evidence to have a full investigation. I get so frustrated
because it took so long to even get the interview with the police and so
much courage to tell them the truth that i have held inside so long. All
this in Jersey is triggering but also so terribly terribly sad is there
anyone else who is triggered by these media covered events? Anon March 1st |
I would like to say that it is so good having
the site and being able to read about abuse issues safely. I like
the site very much and wanted you to know that.
12/03/08
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Thank you for the encouraging comment!
There will be some new stuff coming onto the site over the next
couple of months, hopefully you will get something positive from
that too. B - site moderator
14/03/08 |
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Messages sent in Febuary 2008 |
hi! 1st feb - only a short month and then i can look forward to brighter days. does anyone else get dragged down over the winter months? 01/02/08 |
The dark in the winter months can make it
hard so feel positive. My worst days are the grey ones where the
mist just makes everything grey, inside me and outside too. 11/02.08 |
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Messages sent in January 2008 |
Good news is that the workshops are in the process of being arranged!! The funding from the Scottish Executive will pay for several topics. See the Site content to navigate to the relevant page!! |
Some people think that because I've been a victim of abuse then I'm
a walk-over, someone who can be pushed around to do and say what they think I should do and say. They are very wrong and, oh boy, they don't like it when they discover I'm no push-over. Neither do they like it when I stand up for someone who's not yet as strong as me. It's strange though because as soon as I do stand up for myself then they behave like they're scared of me, like I've threatened them in some way. I suppose if they're the sort of person who uses bullying tactics then they will assume I'm doing the same as them. It's a strange feeling for me 'sticking up for myself' but I think I can get used to it! 14/01/08 |
Just read your words about not letting others
push you around. I admire that you have been able to reach that
place. Some days I can be essertive for me but not everyday. It is
easier standing up for others I think.
16/01/08 |
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Messages sent in November December 2007 |
We have realised that the email link to send messages for the notice board has not been working. This has been changed click 'add notice' button above to send your message. |
Hope for us all at
this time of year
12.12.07 |
Cold – shivering
28.11.07 |
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Messages sent in October 2007 |
We have heard that the S.A.S. group has got
funding from the Scottish Executive to develop projects to help
survivors in Shetland.....here is a clip of the email!!! You
were recently advised that you had been |
hey that sounds cool, thank you for working to get support for us survivors!
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Thank you for emailing it is good to get encouraging words from site users!!
13/10/07 |
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Messages sent in June 2007 |
just read the words of the song. So poignant.
sue
5/6/07 |
I found the words very moving. They are sung by Joan Baez on her album 'Gone from Danger' It is amazing how many folk out there are singing about abuse openly. Courage from them and their openess communicates awareness of abuse. Has anyone out there heard Tori Amos's new album? It is very much to do with the power of surviving.
Bunchy
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