Sexual Abuse Survivors Discussion on Flashbacks

Discussion on Flashbacks

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Site Moderator - There is a good poem sent by someone on the subject of flashbacks. If you click here you will get to the page it is on, scroll down the page and you will find it. click for poem

Hello I get flashbacks. Thank everyone writing about this because I feel less alone.

I have read your notice about flashbacks. They sound very disturbing. I have flashbacks often too and get to feel very disorientated afterwards. Do your flashbacks happen at the same time every day? I think that bodily ones are particularly horrible and yes tiring. I hope that things ease for you soon,

Amanda

I was abused when I was a baby up until about 4 years old extensively. I am now 44 and have had daily flashbacks since May. They are quite disabling as I get very tired before bad flashbacks, and if I have had a busy day I am unable to function the next day until the flashback occurs, then I feel better. I cannot enjoy the hobbies I used to enjoy and as the mild flashbacks are constant I always feel worn out. I cannot even concentrate to read, all I do is watch television and my part-time job. The flash backs are bodily feelings and not really unpleasant, it is the tiredness I can not cope with. Anon

I was sexual abused as a child as an adult had certain things I could not stand and knew why ! Such as flannel PJ”S and the smell of cherry tobacco. I had flash backs when my husband had an affair and I tried to have sexual relationships afterwards. It has been ten years since a flashback, until last few week. I work as a youth worker / mental health and disability worker and have done for the past fifteen years, I have felt fear with some of the people I work with, but the other night a young man with a sexual history turned the office door at 3.30 am in the morning and has done this every shift I have slept over for the past month. Last week twice I felt as though half dreaming and half awake with the weight of a person on my (him). He was not there and I felt silly until I talked to a counsellor as I scared the hell out of me.
Kel

hi,

I think I understand everything in this article, but I've had different experiences. I was abused in the dark, in the silence. I remember smells and emotions, nothing else. Its frustrating because I didn't see or hear anything, apart from breathing. Flashbacks come to me at weird times, I once had one while eating a meal with a cup of coffee. I haven't discovered the link for this yet, I have difficulty eating that particular meal now and drinking that coffee- which is like you were saying about fear in 'the child and the bus'. I haven't self harmed with or after a flashback, maybe mine aren't really flashbacks.

from

Bel

Hey it sounds to me as though what you experienced were flashbacks. They are probably different for each person. That must feel scary with just smells and emotions in the dark. I hope that you will be able to have the coffee again one day. I am glad you wrote here, it is good to know someone else is around. E

Why do the flashbacks always creep in at night, that is horrible. Does that happen to anyone else out there?
6/1/07

just read your question about flashbacks coming at night. That seems to happen a lot. i think it's because during our waking hours we busy ourselves with different things but at night when we sleep the memories are free to creep in because we're not forcing ourselves to be thinking/doing other things. i'd be interested to know if anyone else has other thoughts about this?

Sue

24/1/07

Hi,I think this sounds right. We dream at night and sometimes the dreams are like flashbacks. Also if the dreams wake us we lay in the dark and silence, nothing to fill my mind.....perfect for a flashback to happen.... E
4/2/07

I had a horrible experience the other day, I didn't have any pictures but got all shakey with a fast heartbeat and thought I was going to faint. I know it
was a flashback because I was aware of the trigger that brought it on. One minute I was alright and the next I was not, I hope it's ok to share this here?
8/3/07

Last night I had trouble sleeping then in the dark I had 2 vivid flashbacks. I wasn't expecting them 'cos I havent had any for awhile. They left me feeling yuck yuck yuck. I went online to try and validate what I had remembered because it involved catholic and certain specific clothing. I found a picture of a catholic cardinal and the clothing was exactly as in my flashback. That felt wierd, but also helped me feel less mad. I sometimes find it very hard to believe the things I recall when flashbacks come. Anyone else find that?

12/03/08

Your experience sounds very normal, many survivors doubt their memories however they come. Flashbacks are intrusive and our brain often tries to rationalise them. Sometimes it helps to remember that if the abuse happened to you as a child then rationalising as an adult doesnt always help. Hope for you as you continue walking the path of healing,

14/03/08

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